Groups Discussion Guide
Read Scripture. Go Deeper. Ask Questions. Take Action.
Necessary Masculinity
Scripture
1 When the time of David's death drew near, he gave these instructions to Solomon his son: 2 "I am going the way of all the earth. Be strong and be a man! 3 Keep the mandate of the Lord, your God, walking in his ways and keeping his statutes, commands, ordinances, and decrees as they are written in the law of Moses, that you may succeed in whatever you do, and wherever you turn, 4 and that the Lord may fulfill the word he spoke concerning me: If your sons so conduct themselves that they walk before me in faithfulness with their whole heart and soul, there shall never be wanting someone of your line on the throne of Israel."
Main Idea
Most men have heard the words "be a man" their whole life — David said it to Solomon, Paul said it to the church — but usually without ever hearing a definition, so we end up piecing manhood together from whatever's around us. Our culture is confused about masculinity and often treats it as the problem itself. But masculinity is not the problem; sin is. Masculinity is good, it has a purpose, and it's necessary — and Scripture doesn't excuse men of everything or accuse men of everything; it calls men to something. Paul's charge in 1 Corinthians 16:13 ("Be vigilant, stand fast in the faith, act like men, be strong") gives a picture of four things every man needs:
- A mission — to be focused
- A ministry — to be faithful
- A model — to be fearless
- A mountain — to be firm
Masculinity is not the problem — sin is the problem. Masculinity is not toxic — sin is toxic.
Discussion Questions
- Growing up, did you ever hear the words "be a man"? What did you take it to mean — and had you ever actually been given a definition?
- Pastor Justin opened with his dad fixing everything with superglue and his own "holy trinity of repair" — a pocket knife, duct tape, and superglue — and how he just assumed "that's what men do." What did you absorb about manhood from the home you grew up in, and how much of it lined up with God's design?
- Pastor Justin said, "Masculinity is not the problem — sin is the problem." Where have you seen sin, rather than masculinity itself, do the damage our culture often blames on men?
- He gave four things every man needs — a mission, a ministry, a model, and a mountain (to be focused, faithful, fearless, and firm). Which of those four do you most need to grow in right now, and why?
Summary
In their final words to the next generation, both David and Paul gave the same charge: be a man. It's a biblical command — and the problem was never masculinity, it's sin. Masculinity is good, it has a purpose, and it's necessary. Scripture doesn't excuse men of everything or accuse men of everything; it calls men to something, and Paul's charge in 1 Corinthians 16:13 shows what that is: every man needs a mission, a ministry, a model, and a mountain — to be focused, faithful, fearless, and firm. And you won't become strong by avoiding what's hard; strength is never formed without resistance. That's how a mountain actually gets moved — what used to be in front of you ends up behind you, because you've become strong.
Take Action
- Name your mission. Write one sentence this week — "The mission God has given me to carry right now is ___" — and share it with your group or a trusted friend who can help you stay focused.
- Take your place in a ministry. Pick one concrete way to lead with your faith this week: pray with your spouse or kids, serve on a team, or bring someone with you to church.
- Memorize the charge and take one step up your mountain. Commit 1 Corinthians 16:13 to memory — "Be vigilant; stand fast in the faith; act like men; be strong" — paired with 2 Corinthians 12:10 as a reminder that God's strength shows up in our weakness. Then take one step toward the hard thing you've been putting off.
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